So I sit here at work on my 28th birthday and I am exhausted having worked the worst set of turnarounds a schedule could offer! In the period of five days I span from working until 3 AM to coming in at 4 AM, having to do 8 hour turnarounds leaving me with little time to myself, with Amanda or even to sleep. You know there is a period in Job's life when he was being tested where he just pretty much had nothing left and just sat in his situation (in my own words) and I am closing in on that in my period of trials. I carry around with me a scripture that I read and pray over everyday and it seems to make me feel better and it reads: (Note: I took out the middle part comparing faith to gold which even with it's value can be changed by fire)
"In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a while you may have suffered grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Chirst is revealed." I Peter 1:6-9
I figure that at some point God will reveal his plan and my purpose for all of this and I will not be able to contain my joy! Until then I pray that he moves quickly and for His will to be done, I even have stopped trying to influence it which is big for me. To fully let go...maybe that's why this is happening?!
So to the sweet part (no more bitterness)...I have a mortgage and it isn't that bad. I fought hard on this, one thing about it with lack of sleep I am pretty much straight to the point with people and I had to be for this to happen. So Amanda and I are ready to start down this path...we can't wait but it will be hard to see the comforts of our parents' homes go away. Did we live at home too long...
no doubt but was it bad...
no way. Our parents are terriffic people and we both are very fortunate! So it's happening, I have a mortgage and a wife coming within weeks of each other!! Wow! Happy Birthday to me!
I am very excited about it all, I am just sorry that my job situation clouds my happiness at times as I miss Amanda a lot and I hate to call her or my parents and they are having fun or doing anything really without me. Family means the world to me as does church and I miss both every week and that is hard! I have job prospects each week and I know that this time will pass and I will be blogging on here about nonsense again soon but I thought I would share this as a kind of thearopy...thanks for listening, I will get off of the couch now and let someone else get on.
Oh by the way, I saw today that I share my birthday with Gene Roddenbery and Jonathan Frakes which is really cool as I love Star Trek!! So RIP Mr. Roddenbery and "make it so, number one!" Engage... (cue music)